


Maybe

by bccalling



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Episode: s04e05 There's the Rub, Extended Scene, M/M, Season/Series 04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-12
Updated: 2017-01-12
Packaged: 2018-09-17 00:42:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9296669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bccalling/pseuds/bccalling
Summary: I don’t know. This just happened. It’s a continuation of the scene in 4x05 where Lip asks Mickey if he’s heard from Ian.





	

Lip’s not sure, really, what possesses him to turn back toward Mickey. He shouldn’t care, really, but something about the way Mickey had backed down so quickly and revealed his concern for Ian had gotten under Lip’s skin, and it makes Lip want to reassure him.

“You know, Mickey, I won’t tell anyone,” Lip insists. “I know you’re terrified of the world finding out, but you don’t have to worry about that with me.”

In hindsight, it probably wasn’t the smartest move to challenge a Milkovich on something this sensitive, but Lip’s never been one to think much before speaking, so here he is. And now Lip’s trying to figure out whether Mickey’s really fucking pissed or if maybe he’s about to cry. Mickey’s body is tense, his breathing slow and harsh. He looks like he’s trying to calm himself. His eyes never shift to Lip’s; he won’t even turn to look at Lip straight on, and once the initial fear wears off, Lip thinks maybe Mickey really is about to break down. Because Lip has never known Mickey Milkovich to back down from anger. Any other emotion, though, Lip thinks maybe that would slow Mickey in his tracks.

Mickey’s blinking rapidly for a moment, and Lip can tell he wants to say something, but he bites back the words.

Lip watches Mickey for a moment, sympathy in his eyes. “Will you let me know? If you hear from him?”

Mickey’s silent so long that Lip scoffs a bit, shaking his head and shifting to walk away, because this is so fucking typical, but Mickey’s voice stills him, and he turns back again to watch the man he’d once thought Ian was crazy to fall for.

Mickey’s turned finally, arms crossed over his chest in a defensive gesture, and Lip swears there are tears in Mickey’s eyes. “Will you, uh,” Mickey pauses, swallows hard and wipes a hand over his lips in what looks like a nervous gesture, “will you do the same? I don’t think he’ll contact me. Fucked up pretty bad the last time I saw him. Didn’t fight for him when I should have. Too fucking chickenshit to go after him. Wish I had. Every fucking minute.”

Lip looks Mickey over for a moment, confused at this new version of the neighborhood thug they’d all grown to tolerate. For a moment, Lip thinks he might understand what Ian saw in this man who’s so much more open and vulnerable than he’d ever imagined. “You know he loved you, right, Mickey? If he’d come home for anyone, it’d be you,” Lip reassures. And really, he’s not sure why he feels the need to comfort Micky Milkovich, but here he is.

Mickey swallows hard against the emotion, and his eyes drop to the ground in front of him as he tries to hold it together. He nods, almost imperceptibly, but keeps his eyes averted. “You don’t have to lie to me,” Mickey assures with a quiet insecurity Lip’s never heard in him before.

“I’m not,” Lip insists, eyes never leaving Mickey as he studies the other man closely. “Trust me, man, I fuckin’ wish he didn’t. He’d probably still be here, then. But he’s not, and he does. So, just—if you hear from him, either end it for good or figure it out, man, but don’t chase him away again.”

And that was the wrong thing to say. It’s only a moment of stunned silence before Mickey’s letting the bottle in his hand fly and it shatters against the fence too close for Lip’s liking. Lip thinks maybe he hears a choked sob from Mickey in the singing of glass against metal, and he instantly feels guilty. He’s still struggling with the idea that Mickey Milkovich might feel anything other than violent anger. Lip takes a moment to consider his next question before letting it free.

“Did you love him?” Lip’s not sure what exactly inspires this particular question, but he’s seeing a side of Mickey Milkovich that he never would have believed existed, and he wants to know. For Ian. “Mickey?”

Mickey sucks in a pained breath and wipes harshly at the tears stinging his eyes. “I don’t know,” he answers, choking back what Lip thinks might be another sob. “I think I could have. If we’d had time.”

Lip nods at that, gentle sympathetic smile on his face as he watches Mickey put himself back together. “When I find him, I’ll tell him you miss him,” Lip promises. Mickey hadn’t asked for it, and he stays silent, not so much as a nod, as Lip turns to shuffle away down the street.

It takes a minute, but he hears Mickey’s voice carry down to him softly with a quiet “Thank you.”

Lip smiles with a little nod. He doesn’t turn back—knows Mickey hasn’t either—just continues on toward home. Once upon a time he’d believed, honestly, that Mickey Milkovich was nothing more than a train wreck thug using Lip’s vulnerable little brother. But now here he is, walking away from a broken man who’d so clearly loved Ian Gallagher. Lip thinks, maybe, if Ian comes home, that Mickey could be good for Ian. It’s not a thought he’d ever imagined he’d have, but now it’s oddly comforting, and he hopes beyond all hope that Ian will come home so they might all find out.


End file.
